A Belvedere school has angered parents after banning students from bringing smart phones to school.
Just smartphones. Normal mobiles are OK, it seems.
Mums and dads say they are being forced to buy a cheaper alternative so their children have the protection of a phone for the journey to and from school.
And the reason for this bizarre action?
Well, not – as I first surmised – because the school is worried about them cheating on exams, oh no. A parent lets the cat out of the bag:
“I believe it stemmed from a picture of a teacher on a school trip and they superimposed the teachers head onto something.”
Ah. Comprehension dawns.
Sadly, the head has been to Waffle School:
Headteacher Ian Collins told News Shopper: “Pupils were not ‘searched’.
On rare occasions if a pupil said they did not have a phone they were asked to open their school bag and the staff member looked into it without touching it.
“There has been an increase in the theft of such smart phones on journeys to and from school and I wish to protect our pupils from such occurrences.”
Oh, I see. It’s ‘elf n’ safety again, then?
No, wait! It’s ‘inappropriate behaviour’!
“There have been a small number of incidents where phones have been used in breaks, after school and very occasionally during lessons to film or photograph inappropriately.”
No, no, hang on, I’ve got it! It’s ‘crime prevention’:
“Finally, I am conscious that such phones were used extensively during the recent local unrest and I am trying as far as possible to ensure our students are not involved in any further events of this nature.”
Anyone considering I might be being a little harsh here, and that those are indeed all reasonable excuses for such action, should read on:
The ban does not include sixth formers who are still allowed to bring their smart phones to school.
Who, presumably, never have their phones stolen, or indulge in a little photography and photo manipulation, and who wouldn’t dream of rioting and looting like their younger siblings…