Coming Soon To Streets Near You..!

Police officers who can’t run fast enough to catch a cold, but are wonderfully diverse!

Unfit police officers could be allowed to take a graded stroll on a treadmill instead of a gruelling bleep test under news plans being considered.

And if they can’t pass that, what’ll be the new option? Just standing still for a few minutes? Breathing?

Assistant Chief Constable Rob Price, leader of the national fitness working group at the College of Policing, said a review into the bleep tests will be launched in April.

“We will definitely have to look at 12 months’ data and assess who failed, in terms of gender and age, and assess the community impact,” he told PoliceOracle.com.

“It is something we have to manage with the service to make sure we are not discriminating.”

But I want you to discriminate. I want you to discriminate against anyone not fit enough to be a cop.

Because a wonderfully diverse cop who can’t run fast enough to catch the mugger who just stole my handbag, or who is not physically strong enough to arrest them if they resist, is of little use to me.

4 comments for “Coming Soon To Streets Near You..!

  1. Hereward unbowed.
    February 1, 2015 at 10:12 am

    […]” wonderfully diverse cop who can’t run fast enough to catch the mugger who just stole my handbag, or who is not physically strong enough to arrest them if they resist, is of little use to me.”

    But that’s just it, they don’t want to do ‘arrests’ any more.

    Retreat from the streets is what they do, a fast sleek shiny revved up car is the nearest you’ll get. I can recall the tale, which Littlejohn highlighted, of the lad just recently out of the Army. He applied for a job as a copper, he was turned down due to his not fitting racial profile/quota……in Gloucester area.

    It’s a commonly known fact, coppers these days hustle over catching the Monday morning shift but the Friday evening and Saturday night shifts in Town centres – nah “not me luv!”

    • February 8, 2015 at 8:44 am

      Sadly true!

  2. February 2, 2015 at 1:40 am

    Which would people prefer? ” ‘Ello, ‘ello, ‘ello. I think my SergImmam would like a word with you. “: or, “‘Ello, ‘ello, ‘ello. I think my InspectaFem would like a nag with you”

  3. Lord T
    February 2, 2015 at 11:49 am

    Sounds good to me as I consider the life of crime to be a valid career choice. Much better than being a politician as I can consider those people to be scum.

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